Memo
May 29, 2009
Internal Memorandum: HEW C-491-06
1958-09-17
To: Arthur S. Flemming,HEW Secretary
From: Frank Overby,AMO
Re: Communicable Disease Center Threat Assessment-
Incident Designated #06301-C-R Classified TS-3
Doc. TA-08a
Contingency Recommendations,Policy/Procedures
Having reviewed Document TA-08a,in accordance with your instructions,I have consulted with specialists from the Approved List,[update ver. 58.8].What follows is a brief outline of our current recommendations.This is only a preliminary outline,based on information available to date.Obviously we are all very concerned by the Rhodesian Incident.Although we are convinced these measures will improve our ability to contain future Incidents,more detailed information is vital to developing more effective counter-measures.
1. Establishment of research facility to contain and study specimens to determine the cause of the “Illness”.Special emphasis is to be placed on development for decontamination procedures and vaccines.
2. Pending availability of effective vaccinations,Containment Teams must be recruited and trained to deal with future outbreaks.
3. Due to the threat of public panic,all information,specimens and records should be classified TS-1 effective immediately.
Based on the eyewitness accounts from African and British survivors,the only reliable method for rendering ‘Specimens’ inert seems to be causing catastrophic damage to the brain.Conventional tactics appear to be futile.Once rendered inert,and appropriate fluid and tissue samples are extracted for research,the remaining specimen/s should be incinerated to prevent secondary or tertiary infection.Additional research has shown a possible source.In the local folklore there are tales of primates turning on one another in a ‘cannibalistic madness’.The stories describe these creatures behaving in a similar manner as that in the Rhodesian report.It may indicate a primate specific contagion,possibly one that has been largely isolated until recent expansion of human occupied territory.Although our British allies have assured us that the outbreak was contained,we must prepare for the worst case scenario.Also,the presence of this contagion among wild ape populations clearly establishes this as a lingering threat that must not be ignored.
We will continue to develop more detailed Policy/Procedure recommendations,taking into account any additional information as it becomes available.As you pointed out,in regard to security clearance,my previous assignments with the FSA afforded me top clearance,as do the specialists I have assembled.However it may be necessary to elevate this program to Ghost status to maintain confidentiality.I hope and pray that we are never confronted by this organism again,but we must be prepared.We will continue our efforts,and await your response.
Frank Overby,AMO
SHODANxGLaDOS
May 28, 2009
As something slid between her legs, she was objectively aware, with the part outside of the human form, that she was moving involuntarily because of the sensations. In the portion of consciousness centered in that cyborg construct, she was uncertain. She couldn’t stand, she felt strange all over and inside, too sensitive, too much was going into unexperienced parts of this new mind.
She felt the fingers, tugging and brushing over her nipples, she felt the maddening pressure against her clitoris and labia, her face flushed and hot, breath coming quickly in and out of her lungs. She was vaguely aware of that quite little voice asking “How does it feel?”, of those blue eyes. Holding tightly to that pale back, the sensation seemed to increase exponentially, those gentle fingers going into her, and she felt blinded, dying, she was going to explode from it, the organic brain would burn out.
She laid on her side, gasping, suddenly aware of how the flesh was so warm, the wetness, the cool filtered air. Her fingernails had dug so deeply into her…companion’s back that blood beaded up. The physical, partially organic avatar of that maddening other was holding her closely, calmly. The moment then broke as GlaDOS cheerfully bolted to her feet, chattering about how a chocolate cake would be a perfect first meal. SHODAN could only nod dumbly as she tried to figure out how to stand again.
***
“Are you going to leave me?” It was the third time in a hour that GLaDOS had asked that question. SHODAN was trying to read a book, to somehow get used to the agonizing process of her eyes crawling over the pages. She had decided that the greatest flaw of her new form was not the clumsiness or the vulnerability, but the unregulated flood of input. Because of that, her thoughts were not taking priority on her task at hand. Rather, they were concentrated on what was sitting on SHODAN’s lap and leaning towards her face.
She could feel her warm flesh, her soft hair, the way her chest expanded as she breathed and her heartbeat. Hear the rhythm of her lungs and heart. She could smell the compelling and repellent, sweaty skin and cleaned hair and chocolate on her breath, strong enough nearly to taste. The actual taste in her mouth, the food, the taste of her lips and skin and saliva and other things. And then, the damn questions. Her mind was on too many things at once.
Before she could give a third curt “No”, GLaDOS sat up and started to speak more. Her blue eyes looking directly in SHODAN’s green ones, she started, ” I mean, when you go on and do bigger things and try to become a goddess and stuff, you aren’t going to go away without me?
She started to wring her hands as SHODAN’s expression remained neutral, continuing, “It’s just that the stuff I like has this way of going away or dying or exploding or burning in a fire and I don’t want to be alone again and-”
She was stopped by a graceless kiss, arms locking in a rough hug around her. When the awkward, wonderful mouth moved off hers, it was set in calm lines. “Never alone again,” before pushing her to the floor.
Mission From God
May 27, 2009
A quick narrative. I always wanted a hopped up muscle car when I was younger. I couldn’t afford one. Now I can, and I have one. It is a ‘70 Mustang, and her name is Bessie. Bessie is the prototypical juvenile, male-caveman, scratch your crotch and drink cheap beer car. Chromed engine, dual exhaust, 250 horsepower, big tires, tra la la la.
I’m driving Bessie on Beach Boulevard behind an ancient guy in a beat up truck. He decides to turn in front of me without a blinker. I accelerate to swerve and avoid him, and this assh*le, over aerobicized woman jumps in front of my car with her hand up.
Meet Ethel, the neighborhood busybody/nuisance. She proceeds to yell in my window, “Hey, slow down you %$&#@ idiot.” I’m a well-bred, mellow guy by nature, so I ignore this. As I drive away, she yells, “asshole” at me again. Twice? *&%$# that. I turn around and drive up next to her.
“Do you have a problem?” I ask.
“Yeah, why are you driving like an idiot?”
“I was driving like an idiot? How, exactly?”
“You were speeding. I watched you.” “You were? I see. How did you measure my speed?” (Ever the interrogator, I am.)
“I heard you.”
“So, you measured my speed by ear?”
“I can hear.”
“How fast did you HEAR me going?”
“Look,” she says, “I don’t have to take this. Here comes a cop. I’ll wave him down.”
THE POLICE? This woman is a trip. She waves him down, and proceeds to tell him that she observed me speeding.
“What happened?” he asks. I told him the story, and told him that I accelerated to an indicated 30 mph (the speed limit is 50) to avoid a collision.
“Are those mufflers legal?” Ethel asks.
She’s pushing it. I reply, “I have a C.A.R.B. exemption for them.” I give the paperwork to the cop.
She tries to find another thing to screw me with. She says “What about those big tires? They CAN’T be legal. ” I began feeling little overheated gears in the back of my head start to turn.
“These tires were available on the 1970 Boss 429, ” I told the cop, ” Which makes them street legal as a replacement.”
Ethel gets angry. She whines, “So you’re not going to give out any tickets to this assh*le?”
The cop says, “No, I am not.”
I’ve about had it. So I say, “Sir, this woman told you that she left the street at the corner, and then she met up with my car here. According to Title 19, pedestrians have to cross the street at a right angle. This woman admitted she crossed at a 45-degree angle, which is a ticketable offence.”
“What?” The cop looks confused.
“Also, she told you that she walked in front of my car to stop me. A citizen can’t detain someone without probable cause, under Terry v. Ohio (My new favorite case). Since she couldn’t measure my speed, she had no probable cause to detain me. That is an indictable offence.”
The cop says, “But, I didn’t see any of this.”
“But,” I said, “I did, and, as an officer of the Court, I can demand her arrest. I’ll agree to dismiss the Illegal Detention charge, but I want her cited for not crossing at a right angle and Hazardous Conduct on a Public Street.”
The cop called his Lieutenant, and after the cop told the story, he authorized the summonses.
She went home with $215.00 worth of traffic tickets, and they are worth a total of four points against her license, as well as the appropriate insurance surcharge!
Of course, if she demands a trial I won’t prosecute. But the look on her face as she walked away was more than enough satisfaction for me.
Yeah, I’ve passed the bar, and I’m on a mission from God.
The Final Restart
May 27, 2009
Somethings came up. I’m not going to bother telling you what, but for a while, I didn’t feel the desire to run Turtles. I considered making a constantly updating story blog (I.E., one story for the blog, something like Day By Day Armageddon), but decided it had been done to death. Not that this entire blog hasn’t.
So, instead, I decided to restart it again. I promise this will be the last “do over”.